INTIMACY BY DESIGN JOURNAL 💋Your cosmic-somatic survival guide for love, energy, and embodiment because connection shouldn’t feel like performance art
Let’s open this week with a kind of intimacy most people feel…
but almost no one knows how to explain.
but almost no one knows how to explain.
The intimacy that happens when two Human Design charts merge and create an 8+1 composite —
the kind of chemistry that feels like gravity, recognition, destiny, and déjà vu all at once.
the kind of chemistry that feels like gravity, recognition, destiny, and déjà vu all at once.
For many of you reading this, this pattern has shown up in your life too ...hat connection that feels “inevitable” before you even know the person.
It’s electric.
It’s intoxicating.
And it’s revealing.
It’s intoxicating.
And it’s revealing.
Let’s break this down the Intimacy by Design way.
🔥 The 8+1 Composite: Attraction That Feels Bigger Than You
When two charts combine to create eight defined centers and one open, the relationship becomes its own aura - a closed circuit that takes on a life of its own.
This often feels like:
- instant magnetic recognition
- accelerated intimacy
- rapid bonding
- “I know you” without explanation
- a sense of fate or inevitability
And because only one center remains open, that single center becomes the vulnerability of the connection...the doorway where truth, emotion, and unhealed patterns reveal themselves.
In my 8+1 composite with a Mental Projector, that open center was Emotion - meaning emotional truth would be the place where presence either deepened… or collapsed.
Spoiler: it collapsed.
But not for the reasons you think.
âš¡ Electromagnetic Attraction: The Real Chemistry
Two channels defined everything about how our connection ignited and how it shifted:
1. 7/31 - The Channel of the Alpha
This is leadership by presence -not dominance, not control, not intensity…
just energetic orientation.
just energetic orientation.
I naturally carry Gate 7 as my Unconscious (Design) Sun - the Role of the Self in Interaction.
He carried Gate 31 -Influence.
He carried Gate 31 -Influence.
Together we formed the Alpha frequency.
The unwritten dynamic was:
I guide the direction.
He amplifies the tone.
I guide the direction.
He amplifies the tone.
He felt safe leaning into my stability.
I felt grounded in his attention.
I felt grounded in his attention.
Until he drifted out of himself…
and into performance.
and into performance.
2. 44/26 - The Channel of Surrender (The Marketing Channel)
This is seduction, persuasion, instinct, and recognition.
Gate 44 is my Conscious (Personality) Sun - the pattern recognizer, the energy of remembering what’s familiar in someone’s aura.
He brought Gate 26 -charisma, amplification, performance.
He brought Gate 26 -charisma, amplification, performance.
This is where attraction lit the match.
Gate 44 recognized him instantly.
Gate 26 performed the potential.
Gate 26 performed the potential.
The chemistry was real.
The recognition was real.
The attraction was real.
The recognition was real.
The attraction was real.
But as the charisma became a persona, my Gate 44 saw the shift before he did.
And that’s the moment the relationship started unraveling.
Because electromagnetic attraction begins in the aura...
but it only survives through truth.
but it only survives through truth.
🌒 When Presence Turns Into Performance
At first, he was pure presence ...the Mental Projector who saw me with quiet clarity.
Then slowly, the grounded man became a curated persona.
The embodied presence became an online performance.
The intimate connection became an audience-facing version of him I didn’t recognize.
The embodied presence became an online performance.
The intimate connection became an audience-facing version of him I didn’t recognize.
This wasn’t “ghosting.”
This wasn’t “self-sabotage.”
This was the Alpha frequency destabilizing because the inner masculine lost contact with itself.
This wasn’t “self-sabotage.”
This was the Alpha frequency destabilizing because the inner masculine lost contact with itself.
My body felt it first.
My Gate 44 remembered the pattern.
And my Gate 43 ...the gate of inner knowing ...started buzzing.
My Gate 44 remembered the pattern.
And my Gate 43 ...the gate of inner knowing ...started buzzing.
Which brings us to the current cosmic moment.
🌟 **The Sun Is Transiting Gate 43
And My Mercury Lives Right There**
Gate 43 = Breakthrough.
Inner knowing.
Truth that cracks the shell.
Insight that refuses to stay quiet.
Inner knowing.
Truth that cracks the shell.
Insight that refuses to stay quiet.
Because my Mercury is in Gate 43, this transit amplifies:
- the truth I hear in relationships
- the patterns I recognize in connection
- the insight that arrives before logic
- the intolerance for anything performed
And this activation is happening during Mercury Retrograde…
AND…
On the threshold of 11/11.
You cannot make this timing up.
🔮 The 11/11 Portal: Alignment, Not Manifestation
Let’s clarify this right now:
11/11 isn’t about manifesting a lover, a car, or a vision board fantasy.
It is a truth portal.
It is the alignment architecture of:
- endings
- clarity
- correction
- revelation
- future-self intervention
- ego detox
- relational recalibration
11/11 closes the chapters where you’ve been performing
and opens the timelines where you finally show up as yourself.
and opens the timelines where you finally show up as yourself.
When the Sun in Gate 43 meets the 11/11 portal?
Truth becomes the teacher.
Insight becomes the guide.
And your future self becomes the narrator.
Insight becomes the guide.
And your future self becomes the narrator.
This is not gentle.
This is liberating.
This is liberating.
🌹 A Somatic Moment
Before I ever saw the shift in his behavior…
my chest tightened.
my sacral dimmed.
my breath shortened.
my intuition whispered.
my body said “pay attention.”
my sacral dimmed.
my breath shortened.
my intuition whispered.
my body said “pay attention.”
This is your reminder:
Your body knows before your story does.
Always.
Always.
🜂 Chemistry vs Compatibility
(Print this. Screenshot this. Save this.)
Chemistry is recognition.
Compatibility is integrity.
Gate 43 exposes the difference.
Compatibility is integrity.
Gate 43 exposes the difference.
🧲 Presence Practice (Your Weekly Ritual)
Place one hand on your chest and one on your womb.
Close your eyes.
Breathe into your lower belly.
Close your eyes.
Breathe into your lower belly.
Say out loud:
“Show me the truth I’ve been performing around.”
Wait for the sensation.
That is your 11/11 insight.
That is your 11/11 insight.
🖤 This Week’s Inquiry
Where does my chemistry overpower my clarity?
What pattern is Gate 44 recognizing again?
Where am I leading when I should be receiving?
Where am I performing in connection instead of participating?
What truth is Gate 43 trying to break through?
What version of me is 11/11 retiring?
What pattern is Gate 44 recognizing again?
Where am I leading when I should be receiving?
Where am I performing in connection instead of participating?
What truth is Gate 43 trying to break through?
What version of me is 11/11 retiring?
Intimacy begins when the performance ends.
And this week, the universe is finishing the job.
And this week, the universe is finishing the job.
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